It’s 3.41am. And I can’t sleep. So here I am drafting my weekly blog. Sad, I hear you mutter. So perhaps you’ll forgive me if I indulge in a mini-rant this week – actually it’s hard to be vitriolic when your ears are assailed by a fantastic chorus of birdsong.

Last week saw the final of the Great British Menu competition. I watched amazed – the disasters as well as the triumphs, the self-doubt as well as the ambition, eight grown men with a plethora of top restaurants among them, and not a few Michelin stars, all slaving over a hot stove (and in one case a counter-top barbeque!) competing for the honour of cooking a banquet for homecoming troops. And I saw many similarities with writing.

A few to give you a flavour:
• there is a multiplicity of ways to create a gourmet dish/a riveting book
• success requires endless practice and persistence as well as aptitude and talent
• there may be a set of basic components for a given recipe/genre of writing but it’s the magical touches and expert handling that transform a rustic favourite into a gastronomic delight/ a homely story into an engrossing read

But the one that strikes a painful cord with me is:
• Just because you cook for friends and family doesn’t make you a top chef, any more than dashing off emails on a regular basis equates to being a best-selling novelist

Now, as published authors go, I lurk somewhere in the hinterland just north of total obscurity, but I do struggle with the assumption that what I do anyone could do, probably better. I’ve lost count of the number of people who’ve as good as told me they would/could be writers if they weren’t too busy saving the world, or doing something much more worthwhile (oh, things like keeping in touch with friends; doing very occasional bursts of part-time activity for a charity; keeping the lawn edged; staying abreast of developments in The Archers). Cue suppressed grinding of teeth. Hello? Do they know how friendly and welcoming a native Emperor Publisher really is? Have they ever actually poked their noses into the lair of a Lesser Crested Agent? Happily for them (sadly for me) I’ve never actually voiced my irritation or disbelief – well, not so far anyway. No, my liver is evidently two shades paler than a Casablanca lily.

But hang it all, when someone says to me, ‘I’m an accountant/lawyer/mechanic/plumber/teacher/landscape architect/unicycle rider (delete as appropriate) I don’t reply, ‘Ah yes, I’m going to be one when I’ve finished the family shopping, read War and Peace and had my nails done.’ And in my earlier lives when I said I was a nurse/midwife/university researcher no-one ever said, ‘Oh, I’m thinking of doing that as soon as I’ve finished my tax return, hosted our neighbourhood Scrabble competition and built a pottery yurt in my back garden.’ So can anyone tell me why writing is so undervalued?

Even the birds are suddenly silent. And at 4.01am it’s broad daylight.

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2 Responses to “A wee-small-hours whinge”

  1. Keren says:

    Let me just say that I could never write a novel!!!

  2. Livvy Arnold says:

    Hi Hazel,
    Only just discovered your blog today. Never been one for chat lines etc. but felt compelled to add a comment today.
    I think you are an amazing writer. When I finish most books, including yours, I feel the writer has given me a gift, truly a part of themselves, for indeed they have. Writers like you enable people to experience avenues of life which they would never go down normally..
    Sometimes I have written an article e.g. when I was teaching or for a Writers’ Group. Occasionally I’ve felt pleased with it, even be told “That’s brilliant”, but I know I could never sustain the focus, energy, vitality, depth of research that you pour into every novel.It’s so sad that some people feel they need to put others down, instead of celebrating their achievements.I suppose the only solace you can feel is that they must feel rather inferior and also jealous, so they need to expound on their own missed opportunities for brilliance by saying ( bitchily)that they had “more impoortant things to do”.

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